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cellistkjp

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unprepared entry [Jan. 7th, 2010|01:51 pm]
cellistkjp
I'm dealing with a lot of negative thoughts, especially for the first 4 hours when I wake up in the morning (8am - 12 pm) which is when I finally get up. Typically from 10-12 I am awake and I do not get up because I feel soooo tired. I also have this tick that I've wanted to go away and have asked the LORD to remove from me. He has not removed the schizophrenia nor the tick. I often think about how I am still single and am doomed to be single for the rest of my life. I feel like a black cloud is hovering over my head, keeping me from pushing through the typical morning moodiness, but it usually takes anywhere from 2 to 4 hours.

My self-education regarding schizophrenia is very limited but I keep looking at youtube videos and reading books I can find on the topic. This video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f4R6jln_eZg&feature=related seems rather helpful.

I often dread going to my teaching class because I feel unprepared and like I don't know what is going on at times. My wish is to find others with the same problem and to always be around people as much as I can, which is really difficult. Some people who have had the disease for much longer than I, look like the guy in this video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KnoTwOUb0aQ&feature=related, but I do not do that or look like that.. even though I was homeless.
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Comments:
From: molijynx
2011-04-15 12:09 am (UTC)
keep posting like this it’s really very good idea, you are awesome!

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